3 Lessons To Be Learnt From Burning Out – Guest Post by Rachida Benamar
A few weeks ago, I was enjoying a delicious dinner at a Japanese restaurant for my friend’s birthday when suddenly, I started feeling nauseous and the room started spinning. I don’t know if you have ever been through something like this but I was terrified. Luckily, I was with friends who could walk me to the bathroom to splash some water on my face and stay with me until I felt better.
After a night of broken sleep and still feeling lethargic, I went to see my GP. After explaining my symptoms for about 5 minutes he delivered his diagnosis: I was burning out. I couldn’t believe it. I honestly thought it was just a bad scallop or maybe I was pregnant but burnt out? Me? No way.
Classic Denial Phase
I soon realised that I was just going through the classic denial phase after a shock. Then I started wondering how I managed to end up in this situation. I wrote down my daily routine hoping to find the answer:
- Go to bed at 3 or 4am after seeing North American clients and dealing with overseas manufacturers
- Wake up at 7.30am when my husband goes to work
- Reach for my phone with my eyes half open and check my emails
- Have a breakfast and get ready for the day
- Work on my two businesses, attend meetings, and meet clients all across central London until at least 5pm
- Come home to meet my husband after work and have dinner with him
- Start working again after dinner until 3 or 4am…
I stared at the list for a little while and wondered: “How on earth haven’t I collapsed earlier?”
Burning Out – 3 Lessons Learnt
Burning out isn’t the nicest way to learn a lesson but here are 3 things I took away from the experience:
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Your Health Is Your Wealth
We all take our good health for granted until it we don’t have it anymore. When your body shuts down because it desperately needs a proper rest, you realise how blessed we are just to be walking around.
If you have ever been injured (or even just had a bad flu) you will remember that day when you woke up feeling healthy again.
But we then start to push our body more and more, expecting it to keep functioning.
There is absolutely no point in having a successful business or career if the price you must pay is your health. If you cannot enjoy a walk in your garden because you are unwell then the money that allowed you to pay for that lovely garden was wasted.
-
Delegate, Delegate, Delegate
I readily admit that I was (and sometimes still am) a control freak. I believed that I was the only one who could do certain tasks because if I let anyone else do them they wouldn’t do it “right”.
What I have just written is the lie all control freaks tell themselves, that only they can do something the right way. What I came to realise was other people are totally capable of doing a great job. Often, they can do it better and quicker than me.
We cannot be good at everything and doing everything yourself isn’t the best use of your limited time. We are lucky to live in a world where you can hire someone on an hourly basis to do just about anything for your business.
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Stop Feeling Guilty
We all have that inner voice that can be so cruel at times. Every time you want to rest you hear that voice telling you to “stop being so lazy” and this voice is louder when you work for yourself. When you are self-employed your income depends completely on how hard you work and it never feels like enough.
When you have a 9-5 job there is less pressure and you get perks such as paid holiday and sick days. It is totally understandable to feel this pressure but it is essential to put things into perspective. Realise that your sanity comes first because without you, there is no business. Guilt doesn’t serve you in this case so tell that voice to be quiet the next time it pipes up!
Making Time For You
Make sure you are listening to your body and you don’t let your ambition drive you to burn out. I know the term “balanced lifestyle” is overused but you do need to look at how you spend your day and make sure you put aside time for yourself.
Look after yourself by getting enough sleep, spending time cooking healthy food, going to the gym, meditating or simply relaxing. The time you spend doing these things isn’t wasted, realise that they enable you to work at your full potential.
As with many things, Oprah says it best:
“If you neglect to recharge a battery, it dies. And if you run full speed ahead without stopping for water, you lose momentum to finish the race.”
Take care everyone!
If you like this post, why not read 9 of the best self-care podcasts.
Bio
Rachida Benamar is a qualified Career & Life Coach and also holds an LLM from UCL. Rachida worked in the legal sector before becoming a full-time coach and she is also the co-founder of Rama Publishing, a stationery and lifestyle brand based in London. Rachida also mentors Legacy Award recipients for The Diana Award charity.
