Post by Ben Hackney-Williams. Whether it’s mindset, movement or muscle, celebrity trainer Ashley Borden (above) discusses the secrets to training, empathy and recovery on the Escape Your Limits podcast that will make all the difference in your life.
Ashley is a celebrity personal trainer with a client list including Christina Aguilera, Ryan Gosling, Reese Witherspoon, Rumer Willis. Through her tips below, she’s teaching people why it’s never too late to create the best version of you.
Embrace Competition
Don’t be afraid to be hard on yourself, as long as it’s for the right reasons and with the right motivation behind your discipline.
“I am my hardest critic and coach. I’ve got 5000 bosses living in my head. I’m very hard on myself, but I’m mostly hard on myself with my expectations. I’m not like: ‘Oh you’re fat, you’re ugly…’ Not negative stuff like that. I’m just very competitive.”
“I thrive when my other peers are doing well. I want to know what they’re doing because then it motivates me to do well. I don’t sit in my negative thoughts. I just think: ‘OK, what’s the next thing that I want to create or what do I want to do?’ If something doesn’t work, I just move on to the next thing.”
Allow Yourself To Feel Confident
Feeling good about yourself should never be a bad thing, and despite the attitude of others at times, you’ve put in the hard work so enjoy the results.
“God forbid a woman says: ‘I look really good!’ If someone walked in and said that, most other women would think she was a bitch. Why? Because someone feels confident about themselves? Our society has ingrained women being negative about themselves as being acceptable. If I give you a compliment and you’re a female, you have to say: ‘Oh, but I’ve got five more pounds to lose.”
“For me to say that I’m not apologetic about appreciating myself… I work my ass off! I’m in my 40’s and I feel better now than when I was in my 20’s. The freedom now to strength train… The secondary effect is that you look good. It’s also that my mindset has changed a lot.”
Ditch The Negative Self Talk
Positivity is vital to progress and personal growth, no matter what stage of your journey you’re at.
“A female client will come in to train with me, and the minute I hear a negative comment I say: ‘OK stop. Put the weight down for a second; you need to look at me.’ I tell them that I want to make something really clear, and that I’m not joking. In the hour session that they’re in working with me, there needs to be not one negative thing said about themselves – unless something hurts or they have a question about what they’re doing.”
“It’s a terrible habit to have, and it’s the habit of women to be so negative about their bodies all the time. It doesn’t help. It doesn’t move you forward.”
Get Strong. Stay Strong
A strong body creates a strong mind as you overcome challenges and set yourself new goals to achieve.
“I love seeing people find confidence in being strong. Yes, you can see transformation in weight loss, but I see so much transformation especially in women finding strength and not hating their bodies any more. There’s so much self-hatred, strength training clients gives me so much more freedom from that.”
Bio
Ben Hackney-Williams has been in marketing as head of content and a journalist for over a decade. Specialising in the fitness industry, he’s created consumer-facing material for international publications, driven engagement in supply-side gym design and equipment manufacturing, helped produce over 160 podcast episodes and works in the wearable tech sector.
Very inspiring article! As a society, we are told to be humble and we just reject genuine compliments coming our way, even to the extent of being apologetic. You are right, we must be competitive and feel good about ourselves.
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