Nicole Soames, CEO of Diadem and best-selling author of ‘The Influence Book,’ shares her top tips on how to make it easy for other people to say “yes” to your idea or recommendation.
We all try to influence other people a lot of the time – whether it’s pitching a proposal to a new client, persuading a potential investor to buy into your business idea or cajoling your other half to do their fair share of household chores.
The secret to motivating other people to agree to your point of view is to leverage your emotional intelligence. This enables you to communicate effectively making it easy for the other person to say ‘Yes.’
The great news is that there are practical steps you can take to help you develop your influencing skills so you can win other people’s hearts and minds:
Believe In Yourself And Your Ability
Confidence is contagious, so you need to believe in your own ability if you want to inspire other people. A great way to boost your self-belief is to write down a list of your key skills and strengths and how they can help you influence people. Examples could be strong persuasive skills, a good listener, being empathetic.
Adopt a positive mindset by reminding yourself what’s great about you, your situation and your relationship with the people you are trying to influence. By flipping any negative thoughts into positives, you will have the confidence to back yourself and your ideas and make change happen.
Be Authentically You
People often mistakenly believe they need to “fake it until they make it” to convince others of their expertise. However, the secret to success is being able to connect with other people in a genuine way. So be authentic and show other people that you have nothing to hide.
By being true to yourself and not just talking the talk, you will build trust with the other party that makes it easier for them to agree with your point of view. This means embracing your imperfections. After all – no one is perfect.
So, be prepared to show your vulnerability. It will make you appear human and approachable and this will help you build rapport.
Put Yourself In The Other Person’s Shoes
Strong influencers draw on their empathy to see things from other people’s points of view so that they can understand the best way to motivate them on an emotional, personal and commercial level.
By stepping into the other person’s shoes and understanding their particular needs, you will be able to find common ground and start building a relationship based on mutual trust and respect.
A great technique to help you achieve this is to ask clever questions to uncover other people’s needs. Then you need to actively listen to their response. This means reading beyond the words. After all only 7% of what we communicate comes from the words we use. 93% comes from non-verbal cues such as our tone of voice and body language.
By drawing on your emotional intelligence to develop a confident mindset, communicate in an authentic way and put yourself in the other person’s shoes, you will be well on your way to becoming a strong influencer who makes it easy for people to say “yes.”
Why not also read 17 ways to boost your confidence or 7 tips to feel more confident when you’re not feeling it.
About the Author
Nicole Soames is CEO of Diadem Performance, a leading commercial skills training and coaching company. She is author of ‘The Influence Book’ and ‘The Negotiation Book’.
For more information about Nicole, visit www.diademperformance.com follow her on twitter @nicolediadem or visit www.nicolesoamesbooks.com.
Nicole’s new book, ‘The Coaching Book – Practical Steps to becoming a Confident Coach’, will be available in October 2019.
