Four Simple Ways To Reduce Overwhelm

Post by Georgina Lynch.  Is it me or is everyone struggling with overwhelm? It’s no surprise given the rise of super women juggling the demands of work, whilst being a mother and looking after yourself at the same time.  Life is becoming more and more stressful.

You could blame this on social media, work demands, or too many children’s clubs, but in my work as a Mental Wellness Life Coach I find it’s because women are not prioritising themselves or their own well-being.

This lack of self-care is one of the main reasons why there’s a growing number of women struggling with overwhelm.

By the time someone comes to see me they are usually in the grip of anxiety or depression and close to breaking point. But it doesn’t have to get to this point before, you take back control of your life.

In my case, I let emotional overwhelm lead to burnout, and it meant that I struggled with severe mental illness for many years.

Managing to break free from the labels and medication, I spent the next 12 years studying, researching and gaining huge insights into the real reasons behind my own overwhelm.

Not Feeling Good-Enough?

I now know that the triggers of my overwhelm were driven by the belief of not feeling good enough and not valuing myself. At the peak of my illness, I would self-sabotage regularly, affecting both me and those closest to me. This led to overwhelming feelings of guilt.

Although someone might come to see me and say they are emotionally overwhelmed, at the root of it lays a pattern of fear, self-sabotage and the limiting belief of not feeling good enough.

When you don’t believe you are worthy enough, you tend to unconsciously strive to be the best, fearing failure or feeling left out. This presents itself in the need to always look good, to be seen by others in a positive light and to be a success.

After time, this pursuit for perfection can take its toll. Before long, you will find yourself compromising what’s important to you as you try and please others. And then you end up neglecting the important things, which leads to guilt.

Overwhelming guilt is the creme de la creme of emotional overwhelm.  There is no greater antithesis to self-love.

I have discovered 4 simple ways to reduce the feelings of overwhelm:

Breath!

It sounds so simple, yet when we are in a state of overwhelm, we tend to lose sight of the present moment and our breath is the most perfect way to anchor you. When we are caught up in our thoughts, we tend to get stuck in a past event that is causing us emotional discomfort or create fear about ‘what might’ happen.

When we take a simple breath, it instantly brings us back to the present day and moment.

Overwhelm is only ever created by getting into a fight with your mind. Taking a breath helps you realise a greater sense of awareness.  Plus it will enable you to see things from a more helpful perspective.

Learn To Say NO!

If you’re struggling with overwhelm, chances are you have said yes to everything and everyone. You are seen as a potential ‘people pleaser’ as you aim to make everyone happy.

This is always certainly at the cost of your own well-being. Not only is doing everything not sustainable it leaves little room for anything else.  And when something unexpected does show up, you simply won’t have the capacity to deal with it.

Be honest with yourself and consider who or where you can say no. Maybe it’s a commitment, a kid’s club or an extra piece of work you took on because you thought it might lead to something for you.

Identify at least one thing and make the other person aware in the nicest possible way, that you are spinning too many plates right now and will have to decline the opportunity.

Said in the right way, you won’t upset them at all.

Prioritise!

Quite simply you can’t do it all at the same time. Now that you have learnt to say no, my suggestion is to write down everything you are doing in any given week. Then take an honest evaluation of where you might be able to reduce your weekly commitments.

Next, make a point of prioritizing for the week.  Then each day, prioritise the three most important things you need to get done. Carry this across to the next day and so on.  Or if you want to be really kind to yourself – get rid of a commitment that may be weighing you down.

Make Time To Do What Lights You Up!

Self-care is on everyone’s to do list but is often the last priority. But self-care should be the non-negotiable. The benefits of doing something for yourself are far reaching.

Anything that lights you up and makes you feel in a state of bliss is something you need to be doing more of and without any guilt.

It’s time to give yourself permission to love who you really are, and to honour your needs.

It’s not all about work and family. Putting yourself first is not selfish, it’s essential. You really are the most important person.  Unless you are looking after number one, you will be no good to anyone anyway.

Bio

Georgina Lynch is a Life Coach who specialises in mental wellness. For more information visit www.georginalynch.com.

Facebook/Instagram/Twitter: georginalynch.co.